SETTING UP YOUR DESIRES FOR 2017 (and some kickass prompts!)

I was on the phone with a client today, and we realized that her goals and desires were a little TOO comfortable. 

You know, they were a little bit exciting, a little bit nerve-wracking, but oh-so-attainable that they didn't scare. the. shit out of her, or really stretch her out of her comfort zone.

What did that mean? 

It basically meant she was playing it safe even in her dreaming. 

There was no UMPFFF. 
There was no HELL YES. 
There were no JITTERS. 

Which meant that her energy was leveling-off in a place of "yeah, yeah, I'll get there, no worries". 

Not stepping outside your comfort zone means no personal growth. 

No personal growth means no business growth. 

So we looked at some questions she could start answering that got her imagination working, and we could BOTH feel the excitement.

If you're not sure where to start with planning 2017, start here. 

Start by knowing what the hell you actually want.
Start by knowing how to stretch your desires.
Start by looking within and deciding what you crave.
Start by listening to your imagination.

Here are some questions to kickstart:

✔️ What do you want your weeks to look like?
✔️ What do you want your schedule to look like?
✔️ How many hours a day do you want to work?
✔️ How do you want to feel every day?
✔️ What do you want your client-load to look like?
✔️ How often do you want to travel?
✔️ What do you want to travel for?
✔️ How do you want to pamper yourself?
✔️ What kind of team do you want to have? 
✔️ What kind of relationships do you want to have? 
✔️ What kinds of coaches do you want to have?
✔️ What kinds of collaborators do you want to work with? 
✔️ What kinds of retreats do you want to attend?
✔️ What do you want to outsource?
✔️ What do you want your health to look like?
✔️ How do you want to feel about your body?
✔️ What kinds of relationship do you want with yourself?

etc. etc. etc.

Start there and let it flow, baby. 

xx,
Alexandr

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO FEEL SO DIFFICULT

I know that going after your dreams of living a Daring Life can feel overwhelming. I know it can feel frustrating when things aren't going your way, or when your business isn't growing, or when you're feeling hopelessly lost while everyone else seems to have their momentum. 

I've been there. 

But, I want you to know this: it doesn't have to feel so difficult.

This week in the United States we're celebrating Thanksgiving. Often times, people use this week as a reminder of what we can be grateful for, what we already have, and how much abundance we swim in daily. We're surrounded with family, friends, Black Friday sales, food, fun, drinks, and more...and we spend the week remembering all we've received over the years.

However, once the leftover turkey is finished, once the sweet potato casserole is put away, so many of us go back to living our lives in scarcity, fear and fretting. 

I've been there, too. 

One of the greatest things I've ever done to make my life, my business and my relationship feel easier was to live in a space of gratitude daily.

It doesn't have to be saved for Thanksgiving. It doesn't have to be saved for when you're making money, when everything feels right, or when nothing feels difficult. Feeling grateful first is the path to all the things you desire.

This week, I want to say a big THANKS to you, as well as spend some time GIVING (see what I did there?):

Thank you for wanting more from your life.
Thank you for wanting to be of service to others.
Thank you for wanting to transform and grow.
Thank you for wanting to better the world.
Thank you for wanting to be the best version of yourself.

You, my friend, are the heart of the revolution. You are the wheels that carry courage forward. 

And so, I want to give back.

If you sign up for a discovery call between today and Monday, November 28th (the actual call may fall after that), I am offering $1000 off of my 1:1 coaching package.

This is for the woman who is ready to bust through her blocks, transform her fears into superpowers, get mega visible, find her purpose, break out of the "samey samey" coach mold, harness her individuality + authenticity, and create a magnetic presence that allows her to serve her tribe and lead with passion.

This is for the woman who knows she's meant to be the leader, and is done running in circles instead of moving forward.

If that's you, book your discovery call here and save $1000 on going after your dreams and creating your own Daring Life.

If it's not, I still want to give you something:

That's why I've created a resource library with my BRAND NEW DAILY TRANSFORMATION JOURNAL to help you become the woman you want to be, live the live you were meant to live, and play bigger than you ever have before. Click the link above and download yours today! 

Thank you for being part of my journey, for traveling your own, and for lighting up the world with your passion. 

We need you.

xx, 
Alexandra

IF YOU'RE AFRAID TO BE SEEN...

I want you to know this: I hid in my apartment for years. I barely let anyone in, including my now-girlfriend of 4.5 years (until tequila happened, and so did we), because I was afraid of what people would think. 

✔️ I was afraid they would see my self-help books and know how truly broken I felt.

✔️ I was afraid they would see the cracks in my heart and decide I was unlovable. 

✔️ I was afraid they would somehow find out that I struggled with binge-eating and body-hatred.

✔️ I was afraid they would realize how truly sensitive I was.

✔️ I was afraid that I would lose control of the little bubble I'd created.

✔️ I was afraid of living. 

✔️ I was afraid of feeling.

✔️ I was afraid of ALL of it.

After all, if I didn't feel worthy, how would anyone else think I was? Hiding was some of the deepest pain I inflicted on myself.

✨ But I can tell you this with FULL CERTAINTY: it's far scarier to hide than it is to shine. ✨

✨ It's far scarier to shut the world out, than it is to expose who you are and send out a kangaroo cry to your tribe. ✨

✨ It's far scarier to shy away from judgement than it is to face it (if you ever wanted to have your own back, watch what happens when you have to stand up for what you believe in) ✨

This is not to say that the fear goes away.
This is not to say that you won't be embarrassed. 
This is not to say that it won't be scary.
This is not to say that you'll figure it all out at once.

This is to say that it's WORTH IT to try. 

Even if you hear crickets, even if it feels uphill, even if people may judge you, even when you want to shrink again, and again, and again, know that there are so many of us out here who know how that feels.....and would STILL never go back. 

We're rooting you on, and we can't wait to see you. 

xx,
Alexandra

WHEN CHANGE STRIKES

Dear daring human,

I have to be honest with you: I started my business over a year ago, and, over time, I stopped speaking about what I truly LOVE and CRAVE (cultivating transformation) in order to teach what seemed like a "good idea" (strategies of making money). This was not necessarily a conscious decision so much as a slow percolation of the dreaded "shoulds", but, nevertheless, it happened. 

So many of us want BIG things in our lives. I love that. I love that you want to start a movement, or that you want to find your freedom, or that you want to change the world. We need people like you, like me, to shake things up at the dull party known as "settling", but we so often (and rather unconsciously) find our way back to what feels safe. I know I have, and I gather you have, too.

That's not a bad thing -- that's a human thing. 

But, it's always been my mission to help people live on the edge of their comfort zone, recognize their power, take a chance, and live a Daring Life. Whether that means saying "I love you" first, buying a one-way plane ticket, starting a business, or coming out, it all requires the same inner transformation and courage. It all happens because of your thoughts, your feelings, and your actions. When you eliminate your limitations, that's when you find true freedom and success. 

My big vision has rested quietly in my chest, drumming on my heart until I finally listened. It whispered in my ear at every step, but I was afraid of it. How do I make money on my vision? Where are my neatly planned-out steps? What's my 10-days-to-$10k-process?

Why does this feel so uncomfortable and scary? 

Well, because it's supposed to.

Your dreams aren't supposed to be comfortable. They're not supposed to be the easiest thing in the world. They're supposed to make you GROW, and that always brings fear and discomfort. 

But here's the thing: when you find something you truly believe in, and when you decide that you're gonna move forward in faith and fear, the Universe can then meet you where you are. 

And it can have your back.

And magic can happen.

And, oddly enough, the timeline starts to become less important. You see, I don't care when I "get there", because, by living my true message and teaching what I believe in, I'm already there. When you have certainty in what you stand for, the timeline starts to change. It becomes your TRUTH, your LIFE, instead of just your job.

So what's this all mean, Alex? 

Well, this means that The Daring Entrepreneur™ has become The Daring Life™, and that I'm excited to help you eliminate any of the limitations you've been putting on yourself. It's time to align with what you truly desire, breakthrough your blocks, and get to where you want to go. And then keep going. 

And I want you to know this: if there's something you're afraid of doing, or saying, or pursuing, go ahead and give it another look. See if you're avoiding the drumming on your heart, the chanting in your soul. You've got big things to do here. 

If you know you're meant for more, and you're holding yourself back, let's chat: http://www.alexandracovucci.com/discovery-call

To your success, to daring,

Alex

WAYS YOU MAY BE HOLDING ON TOO TIGHT

I'm no stranger to this. I grew up with a very uppity, controlling and worried mother, and it's no surprise that I learned at a young age to exhibit the same tendencies. Hold onto outcomes. Control situations. Worry about everything.

Unfortunately, that's a surefire way to BLOCK the things you truly desire, and it's also a way to completely stifle your creativity and expression -- two things you so desperately need personally AND professionally if you want to show up, be seen, and share your gifts.

Here are some ways you may be holding on too tight:

✨ 1. Looking for the "right" way to do things -- when you start looking at what the "rules" are, you start squashing your creativity. Darling, you came into this life as a creative little nugget, and trouncing yourself with rules doesn't leave room for FLOW. 

✨ 2. Letting the outcome affect your identity -- does this sound familiar: "if I don't make money (or get thin, or whatever), it means I suck" (or some variation of that)? It's the cyclical dance you do of ineffectively attaching your worth to some kind of outcome, which always leaves you blocked, disappointed, and seeking another HIGH. 

✨ 3. Worrying about what other people think -- you're holding onto something you're making up, which is a sure fire way to block all your creativity, flow, and manifestation. If this is heavy for you, take a look behind "their judgements", and look at your own.

✨ 4. Overthinking, under-acting -- you know the drill: subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, learn, learn, learn, and still never do anything with it. LOVE, it has nothing to do with how much you know. It has to do with what's going on INSIDE of you. 

Take a look at these things and be honest with yourself. Are you holding on too tight? What would it feel like to drop the struggle? 

Everything you want happens on the inside first. It's all about decision, choice, transformation and change. 

You got this.

xx, Alexandra 

HOW TO COME BACK FAST WHEN YOU'RE FEELING HOPELESS

We've all had 'em + we all have 'em: the valleys, the lows, the days when everything feels like it's an uphill battle leading to a battle wound in the soul. The days when everything feels difficult, the days when everything feels far away, the days when you want to bury yourself in a self-help book and never return because YOU CAN'T BE SAVED (says your ego).

But here's the thing: manifesting what we want into our lives is directly linked to our VIBRATION, which is directly linked to how we FEEL, which is directly linked to our THOUGHTS. But on *those* days, all you can seem to think is "I'M DOOMED". 

Not helpful, is it?

What you think and how you feel are HABITUAL. I'm gonna be honest with you here: it's a habit to play the victim to our circumstances. It's a habit to play small. It's a habit to feel like we suck at life. It's a habit to fall in or stay in a low vibration. 

I'm not saying we have to be happy all the time -- far from it. We're humans, and we have emotions. I'm just as human as you are.

What I am saying is this: WE CAN GET BACK TO A HIGH-VIBE MUCH QUICKER THAN WE GIVE OURSELVES CREDIT FOR.

Here's how:

🔥 1. ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL YOUR FEELINGS: denying your feelings is gonna make them want to rage against the machine. It's gonna make them form a picket line and go round-and-round-and-round again. FEEL what you're feeling. Let the energy flow through you. Honor your humanness. 

🔥 2. LET THE ENERGY OUT: Feelings are energy, so physically let the energy out. Here are some suggestions:
- Scream into a pillow
- Go for a run in the rain
- Dance like a fool in your bedroom
- Sprint up the street
- Take a cold shower
- Punch your couch (the softer parts)
- Do jumping jacks
- Do EFT
- Fist pump (this is oddly effective)
- Do 10 burpees
- Swear like an Eminem song 

🔥3. ACTIVELY GET YOURSELF INTO A HIGH-VIBE SPACE: this won't work as a band-aid, so don't try to do this as step #1. Process, clear, and then CREATE what you want to feel (some suggestions):
- Drink a green juice
- Surf pinterest for things you love
- Dance to upbeat music
- Workout
- Write down what you're grateful for
- Go help anyone with anything (this feels great)
- Make a list of your desires (this is one of my favorites)
- Or re-do any of the aforementioned in step #2

Just remember this: you can interrupt your patterns. You can honor yourself, and decide to change. Your ego won't want it, but your personal growth deserves it.

Comment below with your favorite pattern interruptor or high-vibe activity! 

xx, Alexandra 

YOU ARE MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU MAY THINK

A little over a year ago I was sitting on my couch in Oklahoma watching Property Brothers and crying into a carton of mint chocolate chip ice cream. At 11am. On a weekday.

It wasn't one of my finest moments, but it was one of my most important ones. 

I'm sure you've felt it: the weight of dreams that are sitting heavy on your chest. The choked-back vision that you swallow just so you can stay "stable" and "normal", the burning desire that begins in your belly, and leads from your core. 

That's what I was feeling that day on the couch. 

But I was too afraid of it.

I was too afraid to touch it, to hold it, to own it, so I opened a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream, and drowned it out with Property Brothers instead.

However, this day was different. 

This day was the day that my dreams decided to own ME. 

And they came out of me in a rage of tears.

Half of my sobs were fear-based, and the other half were divine relief. I knew this was it. I knew I would do whatever it took to live my life as a coach and creative entrepreneur. I knew I would borrow money, donate time, and HATCH from the shell I'd used to hide behind.

I knew there was no going back.

And so I decided to go forward.

And it was scary as hell.

🔥

I want you to know this: no matter how far away it seems, no matter how heavy your chest, no matter how scary it is, know that you are always in charge of your life.

You can always turn your life around, or choose a different path, or walk away from something that doesn't light you up. You can always shift, and change, and morph.

You are more powerful than you may think, even in the midst of sobs and mint chocolate chip ice cream, even in the face of fear. 

I believe in everything you desire.

xx, Alexandra 

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU'RE CREATING BLOCKS JUST TO HOLD YOURSELF BACK

You may be thinking, "why the hell would I create blocks to hold myself back, Alex?", but, believe me, I've seen it quite a bit. And, in fact, I've experienced it quite a bit as well.

First of all, let me distinguish between having blocks and creating blocks:

Having blocks: You're taking action, you're trying new things, you're learning, maybe you're seeing a bit of success, yet STILL you're feeling stuck, frustrated and like you're running in circles. You're not opened up to the FLOW of life no matter WHAT you're doing. These blocks are often beliefs / emotions / thoughts about money, work, time (etc), that are stacked against you and CAN be changed or surpassed. (that's an incredibly simple definition that's lacking in the depth and layers required to truly understand blocks)

Creating blocks: Essentially, you keep looking for that one thing that's holding you back from taking action, and you won't take action until you figure it out.

What it comes down to is this: when you're using blocks as a CRUTCH to explain why you're not taking action, you're often creating them. 

Lots of people create blocks as an excuse for not taking action in their business.

And that's an incredibly dangerous form of procrastination (spawned from fear).

You see, our egos are incredibly smart, and our brains LOVE figuring stuff out. So when fear creeps in, some people subconsciously sabotage their efforts by believing that they have more blocks to "figure out". This stalls their action while fooling them into thinking their "doing something" (solving it). 

You may see this showing up in the following ways:
- You find that a lot of your attention is focused on trying to "fix" a block at any given time
- You get the sense that you need to be "fixed" before anything works
- Every time you get close to taking action, you happen to have a few blocks "pop up" that prevent you from moving forward until you can figure them out
- You're convinced that you can find out that ONE block that will remove fear and you'll skyrocket to the top

Don't get me wrong, a lot of us have had our fair share of blocks. Whether they're in the form of beliefs that don't serve us, or emotions that create the same patterns in our lives, they do exist. 

But when they become a crutch and prevent you from doing anything, that's when it can be an issue and an excuse.

If you feel you may be creating blocks, first of all, please don't freak out. 

THIS IS NOT ANOTHER THING YOU NEED TO FIX.

It's just something you might want to be aware of.

Then, try these things:

1. Ask yourself what you're afraid of when it comes to moving forward or taking action - sometimes we come up with these elaborate blocks, when, really, we're just afraid of people laughing at our ideas. Facing that fear can take the wind out of the sails.

2. Take responsibility for yourself and your actions - sometimes the idea of having blocks is used to stay in the victim mode. Taking Divine Responsibility in all areas of your life, and see how much more action you're willing to take.

3. Honor your fears - yes, you might be afraid of people laughing at you. But it doesn't ALWAYS mean you have to go back through your history and figure out exactly when that happened and the block that comes along with it. Sometimes you just need to honor the fear (that's trying to protect you), and make a decision to let it come along for the ride (don't let it drive). 

Remember, this is nothing you need to fix. Some everyday awareness can EASILY set you back into motion.

This is also not to say that blocks don't exist. This is to say that blocks can be USED as an excuse not to move forward. And that awareness can bridge the gap.

You got this.

xx, Alexandra

THE TWO BEST THINGS I EVER DID FOR MY BUSINESS (and life)

When I first started my business, there was an urgency about it. Sure, I wanted freedom and I wanted it THAT MOMENT, but along with the urgency of passion there was also a neediness, a freneticism, a frantic quest that often left me feeling like A. I didn't know enough, B. I wasn't enough, and C. everyone else had all of the answers (read: magic pills) that they weren't sharing. 

I'll be honest with you: I struggled.

I struggled to find my place, my voice, my internal truth, and even my own desires. I struggled to trust myself, to trust my knowledge, and to trust that my passion was enough. 

And so I ran around in circles.

You may know the feeling.

This is not uncommon. I see a lot of entrepreneurs struggling with the same things that I struggled with. I see a lot of entrepreneurs withholding trust in themselves, questioning their voice and their quest, and running in circles from one "magic pill" to the next.

The two best things I ever did for my business (and life) completely turned around all of that freneticism, frustration and confusion, and it started to open up the doors to my creativity, steadiness, resilience, trust and confidence. 

They may be able to turn some things around for you, too: 

1. I CONNECT TO MYSELF AND MY WORTH ON A DAILY BASIS: I spent so much of my life feeling like everything was outside of me. I felt like everyone had all of the answers. I felt like everyone had all of the DEPTH of life, and I was just watching it from a skimmed surface. It worsened when it came to my business because I started questioning my knowledge, my worth, my fortitude, and everything else. I started (internally) giving my power away to anyone who wrote a great sales page, or spoke directly to my needs. I started assuming EVERYONE was better than me and had some kind of secret. 

Not only does that feeling suck, but it also stunts creative AND business growth. It is the place where you hold YOURSELF back and STILL go looking for someone else to let you loose.

Connecting to yourself completely changes that. You remember your voice, your passion, your creativity. You remember that everything is really okay...even when it doesn't feel that way. You remember that your ideas matter, your knowledge matters, and, YOU, my dear, matter.

THE HOW: If you've been disconnected for awhile, this one may take a little bit of testing. Try new things out:  journal, dance, write poetry, take a bath, meditate, do yoga, get outside, go out to lunch alone, pray, ask for guidance, rub your crystals, pick an angel card, ask God for help, sit in silence, lay on the floor, take a hike, go for a walk..etc Watch it start to transform you from the inside out. 

2. I CHANGED MY RELATIONSHIP TO RESPONSIBILITY: Responsibility sounds like a drag, right? Kids, work, bills, BLEH. We create this association with responsibility that feels like shit, when, in reality, responsibility is freedom. 

You want a freedom-based business? Then you'll also have a lot of responsibilities come your way. If that doesn't empower you, you're gonna spend a whole lot of time subconsciously running from what you actually want. 

Instead, just change how you view responsibility. It is the antidote to victimhood, and it is the birthplace of action.

THE HOW:
1. Re-write what you WANT to believe about responsibility. For example: "Responsibility gives me freedom and pride. It makes me feel capable and powerful...etc." 

2. Write down everywhere in you're life you've been playing the victim, and how you can take Divine Responsibility instead. Example: "I don't have enough time to work on my business" changes to "I am going to carve out two hours this week to work on my business because it's important to me, and it's worth it to my family". 

It's so easy to complain and pretend everyone else has the answer / solution / magic pill, but everyone YOU admire has taken the time to connect to themselves, and stood deeply in the responsibility to be in charge of their own lives.

Shift these two things, and your world will change. Just watch :) 

xx, Alexandra

I USED TO BE A BINGE EATER

I used to be a binge-eater. 

>> I'm talking cancel-plans-because-I-couldn't-get-out-of-bed-binge-eater. 
>> I'm talking hide-in-my-room-and-devour-a-box-(or-two)-of-cereal-binge-eater.
>> I'm talking 40-extra-lbs-on-these-bones-binge-eater.

For the majority of my early twenties, I would restrict my food, control my diet, and subsequently binge on "bad food" to the point of a painful and distended stomach, which also served as a constant reminder of my own shame. 

✨ Not too many people know this about me. ✨

In fact, because I'm (now) a small size, most people assume I've never had an issue with food in my life.

In reality, it was all I thought about. I often wondered to myself, "what would I use my brain space for if I wasn't constantly suffering with thoughts of food (losing weight, being "fat", etc)?", "who would I be if I wasn't defined by this pain?", "what would I even be worth?".

- I refused to have a girlfriend for six years. How could I let someone see my body?
- I refused to wear shorts, or a bathing suit, or be naked around anyone. How could I show people what I wanted to hide from?
- I refused to tell anyone that I was struggling. How could I let someone see this disgusting version of me? 

It was the darkest space I've ever been in. 

✨ I healed my negative relationship to food once-and-for-all about four years ago, and it still continues to be some of the sweetest freedom I've ever tasted in my life. ✨

I finally know what it feels like to never fight food, to always eat what I want, to have the body I always envisioned, and to have people assume I've never struggled with food (ha!). 

I was looking back on this recently, and I realized that a lot of my internal shifts relate SO MUCH to the internal shifts required for building a business.

And so, chick, I wanted to share some of the most important ones with you.

✨ 1. I gave myself permission to stop being perfect -- I stopped trying to find the "perfect diet" or body fat percentage. I stopped trying to look perfect for everyone. Instead, I allowed myself to do and eat what felt good. 

✨ 2. I visualized (and worked my mindset) every single freaking day -- every night when I went to bed I visualized the exact body I wanted. I visualized a muscular and lean body, and the number 112 on the scale (when I cared about the scale). I visualized looking down at my stomach and feeling amazing, being in a bikini, etc. And you know what? My body regulated at 112 - muscular and solid. Even when I lived in Oklahoma for two years drinking more beer and eating more shit than ever in my life, I always re-regulated at 112 naturally. While I rarely check the scale anymore, I can always feel my body re-regulating to the body I visualized constantly. 

✨ 3. I learned to love myself as I was -- I honestly and truly thought that I was unlovable unless I looked a certain way (hence not showing anyone my body). In fact, the month I gave myself permission to love myself was the month I started dating (okay, okay, sleeping with) Dre. My whole energy shifted when I started loving myself, and my internal worth started to skyrocket.

✨ 4. I allowed myself to be seen -- I started telling a few people about my truth with food. I started wearing shorts. I stopped cancelling plans even if I binged (or slid back). I started sharing my emotions. Which brings me to...

✨ 5. I faced my emotions -- I stopped (literally) stuffing them down. I sat with them. I felt them. I let them happen. I stopped trying to stop the pain, and I just let it course through me. This is essential for growth and healing of any kind.

✨ 6. I started celebrating the journey itself -- every single day that I didn't binge was a celebration. Every mistake was a celebration. Every backslide was a celebration. I didn't care, I celebrated. I stopped looking at how "far" I had to go, and instead I enjoyed the shit out of the journey. I enjoyed the newfound feelings of being seen and touched and held. I didn't wait to "get there". 

Once I did those things, once I stopped fighting, once I stopped hiding, once I stopped trying to be perfect, once I enjoyed the journey, I started getting results IMMEDIATELY and QUICKLY. 

⭕️ The internal shift for building a business is no different. ⭕️

Become the woman you want to be NOW. Feel the feelings you're afraid of, and let them pass. Allow yourself to be seen, and fuck being perfect. Learn to love the shit out of yourself, and celebrate every single step of the journey. 

Whatever you want is possible. Wherever you want to be is waiting for you. All it takes is YOU stepping into your power, giving yourself permission, letting your guard down, and taking a chance. 

Believing in you,

xx, Alexandra