What fear of competition is really all about

Hey lovebug,

I hope you had an awesome weekend. Dre loves all things Halloween (and any other holiday) so we spent some time doing the whole haunted house thing. I'll be honest: she usually leads the way while I hide behind her with my face in her back. I'm working on my haunted house confidence. There's always next year...

Today I wanna talk about the fear of competition, and what's really going on when that strikes.

I'm no stranger to the concept of competition. I grew up with a superstar sister (All-American lacrosse player, general badass at anything she tried), so I learned early on that success looked a certain way: winning, being the best, being the most "popular". That wasn't the message that was told to me, but that's the one I picked up. 

The problem with that is that it comes directly from your scarcity identity. The part of you that thinks you need to have more or do more to be more. 

Here's what's really going on with your fear of competition (and what to do about it):

1. You're afraid there isn't enough for you: simply put, the fear of competition indicates there's a fear of lack. There's a part of you that's not fully sure if there's actually enough for you in terms of money, time, love, etc. Ironically, if you see everyone else have something you want, you've made it mean that you can't have it.

Start proving yourself wrong. Look for evidence that speaks directly to the fact that there's more than enough for you. Figuring out what you actually want to bring in, and start looking at your odds. It's likely you've got pretty good odds.

2. You don't trust yourself to make it happen: I see this one a lot in people who have identified as "lazy" or "inconsistent". Focusing on competition can sometimes be an indicator that you actually don't trust yourself to make it happen for you. Instead of admitting where you feel you're not taking responsibility, you find ways to focus on why it won't work. This allows your subconscious to play "victim" to your circumstances instead of taking control. 

Recognize if you're playing the victim, and start asking yourself how you see yourself. Creating the identity of someone who does whatever it takes is crucial when you're facing this subconscious fear.

3. Your subconscious is looking for ways to be special: I've seen this one in quite a few people. They stay stuck in the same spot because the struggle makes them feel special. They don't know who they will be without the storyline of a struggle, and it's alluring to feel special in your own flavor of struggle.

Create a new story. Write it down, recite it daily, and start living from that place. Find 10 reasons you actually do believe you're special and OWN those. Start honoring yourself.

If any of those ring a bell for you, listen to your intuition and give my suggestions a try. The fear of competition is usually a mask for something else that's going on in your subconscious, and addressing the root can be incredibly powerful. 

I've got a few Wealth Identity Immersion sessions available if you're ready to stop sabotaging, and start creating the life you're here to live.

You got this,